Lisa's Oasis

Impromptu Hiatus

There has been a deep lull in my work lately. I will not apologize for it, I feel like life happens to everyone. This does not warrant apology.

My mom discovered a lump on her breast 2 years ago. It got worse while I was in school obtaining my masters in psychology. She neglected it, likely hoping it would go away, until it ulcerated and she couldn’t get the bleeding to stop. Then she told me about her discovery. Ten days before my schooling ended.

I saw the fear in her eyes. The disappointment on her face as she said words that didn’t make sense to cover her apparent cowardice.

I thank all the lucky stars, the Universe, the Creator, the Ancestors, and any story that would be appropriate that her fear brought her to me so that we could fight this together ❤️ She had been fighting for so long by herself!

We’ve been dealing with 5 children and many pets, even managing the death of one of them, since this dscovery. The past several months have not been easy, but we are blessed with a strong and tight family with close friends. Their assistance and willingness to step in have been essential.

This is my cancer story as well as my mother’s.

This story keeps compounding and changing. It has, unfortunately, possibly added another family member to the plot. The increased stress prompted me to turn to writing, as I do find solace in jotting down my thoughts. It helps even if I don’t publish.

My mother’s bravery is a beacon of sincere truth guiding our family through untold trials. I am beginning to see that her fight is a precursor to coming challenges. Her example will lead us down the path to unity and our family will triumph and prosper.

Well, at least that’s how it goes in my story.

She is doing well with her treatments. We are not done and have a long way to go, but the road to healing is more of a journey than a destination. We are blessed and successful in the most amazing ways!

Thank you for listening and I hope you remain well. Keep going! Until next time… ❤️

When I found me

“If you are not free to be who you truly are, you are not free” – Clarissa Pinkola Estes

I have learned so much these past few years!

I am most definitely not going to be so trusting…. Absolutely in love with my boundaries and not so easily giving that love away! I need communication to be free-flowing and mutual. And, when I know I see something that is there, I should trust that I can see it.

The excuses, stories, and “reasons” that make up someone’s actions that have always worked for them should never let another person feel less than or never enough. The cycle must be stopped, no matter how tough….. getting off of that spinning playground device is never easy and you always end up feeling sick til you get over it!

My favorite part was waiting for the promises.

I’m not stupid by any means, but the gold at the end of the rainbow was really enticing…. Especially when I was cut off from everything that I could use to get that gold myself! None of what was promised was I good enough for. I never got it. So, now I have to work to heal as well as gain my success back!

I will never feel sorry for myself. Getting back on the horse that threw me probably won’t happen, but I can pick myself back up.

The lessons learned in life are never easy so they can be remembered. They embed themselves into your being and bind to your personality where they get real comfortable all up in your behavior.

These lessons say, “focus, friend. There’s a lot left to learn”!

Pre-K Graduation

My 5-year-old just graduated preschool. This means I must enroll my new kindergartener into our school system with her older siblings. I must re-enter her identity into our faulty system to keep track of her records.

I am incredibly proud. She has excelled, so far, in this journey. She’s been above average for a normal child her whole life, even with her challenging beginning.

She was born addicted to fentanyl and cocaine prematurely and spent over 2 weeks in the hospital before entering the same foster home as her brother. She couldn’t even go home with her family.

Most premies enter the world underdeveloped and remain in a deficit for most of their growing stages. This one was a model for normal development for the first 6 months, and then she began exceeding her normal aged peers.

I am truly excited to see where she ends up in 10 years. She is a whole adventure all in herself!

Congratulations, baby girl! 🎓🦄 … you amaze me! ❤️🌈

Financial freedom prayer

Archangel Ariel
🌟⭐️🌟⭐️🌟⭐️🌟
Please open the door to my financial freedom💰💸

so I never have to depend on other people for money and support.

🤲🏽Help me to become fully capable of making my own living and giving generously to those who need my help. 🙏🏾Amen!

Peace in chaos

I’ve had a rough few months. My family is good, but everything else is crazy hard, right now.

I have been in tears more times than I can count. I understand that it all works out, but I don’t understand how. Which is the right move? Where is the right step to make it better?

Sometimes, we don’t have it figured out. This is what faith is for.

We have faith in ourselves. We have faith in the future we visualize. We have faith in the successful outcomes of our failures.

We have faith because we must believe something good can come of all of this!

When I am in doubt… when i don’t know what the next move is…

I sit in the chaos and take a breath. Just sit a minute.

It doesn’t solve everything, but it helps to refocus and gather strength for the next round. 💪🏾 🤲🏽

Daily Writing Prompt 4/3/23

Daily writing prompt

Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?

View all responses

Answering the prompt; Which aspects do you think makes a person unique?

My answer at this time will have to be trauma.

Everyone experiences trauma. Newborns experience the trauma of birth, and the sick and elderly experience the trauma of facing the end of their life and no one is exempt from the traumas in between. How a person handles their trauma makes them unique from everyone else.

No one handles trauma the same. This is a fact that creates differences and relatability in us all. Taking a look back at your life you will see how each traumatic event changed you and, in most ways, helped you to grow. I am no different. Each trauma created a new facet to who I am and helped me get through the next trauma. Some of those traumas actually inspired me and helped me to forge my path. These things that happen to us have a meaning and a depth that we can only understand after they happen. We should all take a step back and ponder how these terrible things help us to grow and blossom into our best selves.

Blessings.

It’s Friday the 13th!

Have to post a blog on Friday, the 13th so everyone knows that it’s just a day….

A wonderful day! All great things happen on Friday the 13th!

I have never thought of any day as “bad” or “unlucky” so, I experience no dissonance when expressing my love for Halloween and Friday the 13th. Always, since childhood, have I been a fan of both… and, lately, I love Mondays, too!

Take the time to create every time you feel like nothing is going your way. A smile counts!

Blessings, always… 🫶🏽

Merry Christmas! 🎄

Well, I know not everyone celebrates Christmas, but this story is about Christmas.

My mother has always loved Christmas and I could never figure out why. I have always felt slighted by Christmas… like I had done something wrong to get on Santa’s bad side. I never got what I asked for, nor what I wanted!

Finally, when I was 7 years old, I came across a random toy while looking for something completely different 🙄 around Christmas time. I may or may not have been searching with my brother… yes, of course he would have been my scapegoat. 😁

I didn’t tell my brother I found it; secrets came out of him like pee. I quickly shuffled out of the tiny space and acted like nothing happened. I also told my brother the search was off and I didn’t want to play that game anymore.

A few days later, I opened a gift from under the tree, labeled for me…. and guess what was in there…. yes, it was what I found. I know my face lit up and I squeaked a little at the little Muppets vinyl sticker playset, but my mom’s reaction changed my mindset about Christmas completely.

I still hate Christmas but, for different reasons now.

You see, mom thought I really enjoyed finding that gift. To be honest, I loved it, just not that much. The glee was because I finally got solid proof that I was telling the wrong person what I wanted. That’s why I wasn’t getting it! I really wanted a bike for Christmas. I really wanted a bike EVERY Christmas! That little box taught me lessons on people, family, and Santa 🎅 in that instant.

First, Santa is Black! Second, you are selling yourself short on this idea of Santa. You’ll get way more from your kiddos if they understand that you are the one busting your a$$ to get them a great experience on Christmas morning! Third, this is all about the smile you see on someone else’s face, not that you get what you asked for or not.

Let’s be real; this overproduction of drama doesn’t put anyone in good spirits. I’ve been through the Walmart parking lot this time of year. Not doing that again, ever.

But, that “feel good” Christmas movie you watch every year (my kids love home alone) tugging on the heart and improving the moisture in your eyes, gives you hope that humanity will, once again, value their loved ones smiles over everything.

The little things…

Should we start by saying that big things come in small packages? Or, maybe mention how small talk brings a big impact? How about my favorite sayng when I was in high school, “I may be small, but I’m mean and mighty”! There are so many ways that the seemingly insignificant has brought about revolutionary change…

Rosa Parks’ exhaustion, Emmitt Till’s mother, numerous accidental discoveries, you name it. The one, tiny change in yourself is the one most important to the world today. That’s the one that brings the next revolutionary impact! It’s all in the way you express what you see. You have to see it first… then, what you make of it is where the magic lies. Do you believe it, or do you let it fade into imagination. Do you breathe life into the revolution or allow it to pass you by?

Freedom of choice may be an illusion, but how you express your discoveries is much more important than that. Your Freedom lies in what you do with what you know!

Now, your expression is an attitude!

Do not allow the little things to get you down. You’re bigger than that! 🫶🏾

Starting again

Where some may find me insane, others find me heroic for beginning my masters degree at this time.

Please, allow me to give a little insight; I am currently one month away from being half a century in age, I have 5 children age 2 to 10 in my home, my childcare assistance has been revoked, I just bought a car to fit all of these children into safely and do not have income to cover monthly payments, and my computer crapped out on me.

Ok, now I believe myself to be insane!

I have always believed in doing things with my whole soul involved. I do not feel ready to do this but, I think the Universe has big plans for me!

I want to make a difference in the right way, not just in a big way. I’ve seen too much pain come out of addiction for so many, especially children. I have to be able to do something about this!

In my studies I want to better myself and better my chances of getting through to those that need my help. My responsibility to the children in my care and the parents trying to get help for their babies, this is what pushes me. I need to know that I can make a difference to a family. I need too know that difference will be beneficial to society as a whole.

With this being said, I begin my Masters in Psychology with a solid, heavy goal in mind. I will continue coaching and maintaining my guide status but, will be gaining insight on my clients in a different light. Mindset work is always fluid. Where the flow is taking me now, I only know what I want the feeling to be. I am able to make anything I want from this, and I want to spread my peace.

I will be sharing as much of my journey as I can here. I have no idea how much time I will have to dedicate to blogging when I must write whole papers!

Blessings to everyone… you are a gift 💝